Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Once a mormon, always a mormon!

Well as everyone that has come within 100 metres of me is aware, I used to be a Mormon.  That's right a fully fledged member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Days Saints! Don't hyperventilate those of you who didn't know that because there is something much more sinister that you didn't perhaps know - I used to be a lesbian too.!!!! Hee hee.  Alas she has tried EVERYTHING.  Well did you also know that I enrolled to attend the Brigham Young University in Provo Utah? Hmmm?  Did you?  I think not. Why am I telling you this? Well because today we drove through Provo,  Utah (also the rest of Utah too) and I had a flash of what my life could have been. Sorry  Lon, not as a multiple wife family but a boring regular Morman family.  And what a bloody beautiful place it was.  We did stay in Utah last night at Cedar City.  Oh I'm so sorry I didn't blog last night but I felt overcome with the need to return to church and confess my sins in the mormon way, giving up swearing, giving up alcohol,  giving up drinking tea and coffee and of course I donned my "garments" for marital bliss.  NOT!!!!! I was just too busy getting smashed in my RV and watching porn - ok that is not true either, or is it.....  Anyway, sooooooo, Utah was absolutely amazing and I recommend anyone and everyone to come and see the brilliant scenery and the sparkly clean RV parks.  I almost felt like reading my old Book of Mormon (which I still have stashed away I might add) whilst sitting on the loo.  But I  didn't.

Ok so I have become a heathen once again as we crossed the border again into Wyoming.  Hell what a different place this is.  Cowboys, porn, fireworks and alas crappy RV parks.  :-(   However, everyone is still very friendly and I was accused today, and I quote, "of speaking funny".  What the?  I guess it is true.  I only seek comfort from the fact that NO-ONE can understand Shane and they always look to me for interpretation - Liss I know you will like that.  Grace is holding up well but is "getting bored". No surprise there really.  Shano and I spend all day yelling back to her in her Taj Mahal she has set up for herself at the table, to look at the deer or the canyon or the river but....... BORING!!!!  We are taking her to see a "for real life" dinosaur fossil soon so that will at least get an eye roll I hope.

OK signing off now or I would go on forever.  To recap, we travelled (or should I say traveled) through 5 states now and I have been most attached to Utah - not for the holiness or the "garments" with appropriate hole-age, but for the tremendous scenery.  It is breathtaking.  Love to all.


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